How to See More Than What’s Missing

The gift of "accidental insights" and purposeful ones too

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 on Unsplash

Last summer, I applied to teach my Soul Shift workshop at the renowned Kripalu Center in Massachusetts. The application was fifteen pages, but I’d been asked by my East Coast community members to expand my retreats to their area, so I gave it a shot.

To my delight, my application was accepted. The center had availability the weekend of April 19-21, 2024. I jumped at the chance and have been sharing news about the event for several months now.

The workshop programmer recently let me know there were just eight registrants for my workshop. Knowing I paid out of pocket for flights for myself and my teaching assistant, I did the math.

It wasn’t good.

My teaching commission per participant multiplied by eight equaled a number that barely covered my transportation costs. This means no compensation for any other costs incurred, nor payment for my emotional labor.

I started to panic, my mind filling with thoughts like:

“You’re going to go in the hole. You shouldn’t have agreed to pay for travel expenses. That was stupid.”

 “Why did you think you could teach here? I bet all the other workshops being offered at Kripalu in April are way more appealing.”

“This is not enough…” quickly turned into “You are not enough.”

Whoa.

I have been on my Soul Shift journey long enough to recognize when I am falling into a scarcity mindset way of thinking. Fear of failure, perfectionism, and a need for external validation are things I have worked very hard to overcome. But one thing that will take me right back to self-limiting thoughts and beliefs is fear of the unknown. When the future is unclear or my expected plan unravels, my default response is to strive for more in order to be accepted and successful.

By recognizing that I was in triggering territory, I was able to pause and acknowledge my feelings of insecurity. I recognized fear was doing the talking, and I’d promised myself years ago that I would not let fear stop me from sharing my gifts with the world. Using a technique from my Soul Shift book, I spoke to myself like I would speak to my daughters if they were in this situation:

“The only thing you can control right now is whether or not you will show up and share you gifts. You cannot control how your gift will be received, who will be in attendance, or how things are going to turn out. And you know what? Those factors are not your concern. Showing up bravely, boldly, flawed, and full of hope – that is your only job. And you are made for this.”

Over the next couple of days, I noticed when insecure thoughts about the registration numbers came up. This awareness helped me resist the urge to write “better” invitations for the retreat and inundate my community with them. I also worked through the urge to ask the center if there had been any more registrations. I chose instead to focus on developing content for my workshop, which helped me stay in the present moment.

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A few weeks ago, I received an email from someone I’d recently connected with on Substack. Amy Smeal of

Artuition

was interested in coming to the retreat and wondered if I would have any use for her skills as an art therapist.

I couldn’t believe it. For years, I have wanted to incorporate art therapy into my retreats, but I didn’t know how to make it happen.

I wrote back immediately, sharing my enthusiasm for the idea while being straight-forward about my ability to compensate her given the situation. Amy put my concerns to rest and suggested we chat over the phone.

For as long as I live, I won’t forget that phone call. I learned more about art therapy in 45 minutes than I had in my whole life. I learned:

• Different art materials offer different therapeutic qualities. Pastels, crayons, colored pencils, markers, and paint can evoke or support a different unspoken experience. Amy described the fascinating benefits of clay and how this highly sensory medium can be used in group settings.

• Traditional art materials in art therapy may be intimidating for people who might not have engaged in art since childhood. Amy said she chooses materials that are less intimidating for this reason.

• Sketching can help people communicate their inner thoughts, not just visually, but also by allowing time to better process these thoughts.

• Art can express what is occurring in the mind that may be difficult to put into words. Amy said in therapy sessions, the art is like having a third person in the room, helping to access some of those hard-to-reach feelings.

As Amy shared her wealth of knowledge and experience in her kind, soothing voice, the most comforting thought came over me:

“Nothing is lacking.”

In that instant, worry of lack and inadequacy was solidly replaced with trust in abundance.

After the call, I was feeling much more optimistic, not just by what was unfolding, but also by how the unfolding came to be.

I’d build my treehouse on Substack because I wanted a smaller, more intimate place to connect with my readers away from social media. It was through this smaller community on Substack that I connected with Amy. After reading about the retreat, Amy followed a persistent internal nudging to reach out to me… and because I’d shifted my mindset, there was room for this opportunity to grow.

Room to grow

Connection

Creativity

Possibility

Awareness

Love

These are the riches of life; they cannot be measured in quantity; they are measured in heart. If we do not open our hearts due to fear, we will fail to experience these riches, and we will fail to flourish.

My friends, a scarcity mindset can block us from fulfilling our purpose and experiencing joy in a myriad of ways. It can cause us to overschedule ourselves, be overly self-reliant, and preoccupy our minds with doubt. It can force us to play small, seek perfection, deny our gifts, and invalidate our worth. It can cause us to feel anxious, stressed, depressed, and stuck.

But through awareness and self-compassion, we can shift from thinking in limitations to thinking in possibility.

But what if I don’t fail?

But what if my unique voice is needed?

But what if I AM ready?

But what if this IS the right time for me?

An abundance mindset allows us to see more instead of less: more alternatives, more resources, more paths, and more details.

During our call, Amy used the term accidental insights. She was describing how sketches can reveal information on the emotional state and past experiences of an artist simply by noticing details like line, color, shape, and placement.

Upon being told to draw an apple anywhere on the paper, one of Amy’s students placed it directly inside the hand of the figure on the paper.

“In a world of infinite possibilities, it landed there!” Amy said, noting the metaphorical relevance of the fruit being placed in the hand.

This example of an accidental insight was pulled randomly from Amy’s mind, but it felt like it was handpicked for me.

Nothing is lacking.

That is my mantra for the next 60 days leading up to the retreat; it can be yours too.

Good things grow in small numbers.

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How might an abundance mindset shift help with an unknown you are navigating right now? How has art helped you in processing your thoughts and emotions? Share in our supportive comment section. We can learn so much from each other.

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My friends, if you have any inkling that you are supposed to be at the Soul Shift retreat, please come. It is shaping up to be one-of-a-kind, and your presence would elevate the group’s experience immensely. Registration starts at $602, which includes weekend accommodations, meals, and course tuition. Click here for all the details and feel free to message me with questions or apprehensions.

If fall is better timing for you, I will be leading my workshop at the Art of Living Retreat Center in the Blue Ridge Mountains of North Carolina Oct 4-6. Reservations start at $747. Click here for all the details.

COME ARE YOU ARE… our next Zoom gathering in the treehouse is coming up! It is happening on Sunday, February 25 at 8pm Eastern Standard Time. Feel free to use the Dateful Time Zone converter to figure out what time/day that is for you. I’ll be leading the call from a candle-lit space wearing soft pants decorated with cat fur. Please come as you are too! The monthly Loft Lounge Zoom Sessions in Rachel’s Treehouse are a chance to breathe, connect, and nourish the roots of what matters most. Meeting times and days of the week will vary so everyone has a chance to participate. The Zoom link will be sent to paid subscribers at the end of next week. If you are a free subscriber and would like the full community experience at Rachel’s Treehouse, you can upgrade your subscription by clicking below. Your tangible investment is immensely helpful to me and my family.